Photo Journal #194: November 19, 2014 (Wednesday)/Healing and Wisdom from God

Got great shots today when we fetched Kathy -at least in my standards (even if they are blurry). hahahahahahah! I guess Kamiki’s right. Looking at the photos we took reminds us of the emotions we felt when they’re taken.  I just am so passionate about taking photos of the sky whether at dawn, dusk or any time of the day. The sky reveals so much about God for me.

What I love about this day are the nuggets of wisdom I received from God! There are four realizations today.

First, all my goals were clarified and affirmed by God (at least now, I believe) but I was asked by God to do them with the right intentions. All this time, I never thought I aimed at ticking the items off my bucket list because I want to get ahead of others, which is totally pointless. I know that if that’s the case, I will keep on running without getting to the finish line. Now, instead of thinking to lose weight to prove to everyone that I can be sexier, more beautiful, etc – I focus on my health and the effect of this to my parents and the people I love. Before I unconsciously want to be a doctor because it is a sign of power and dominance. Today, I decided to list the “good why’s” of that dream. And, I was able to identify them. Along the changing of intentions comes the resolve to remove insignificant pursuits. I finally removed some items that are useless in my journey to heaven. People always got dazed by the numerous goals I set but surely, God isn’t especially if I’m aiming for skills, education, material possessions or anything else that He hasn’t shaped me for. All thanks to Rick Warren and Bo Sanchez, I listed my core gifts and identified my purpose. After setting them, I felt at peace, relieved and clarified.

Second, God told me today how critical I am of others, judgmental and accusatory. That’s part of me that needs healing. And I am trying now. Every time I accuse someone of not liking me based solely on their non-verbal behavior, I stop and remind myself that I am not God. It helps. Of course, it will take a lot of practice but I’ll do it, with God. No slander (even if I only did it with my family) and no accusations. I am only human and so, I should stop from acting like a god.

Third, In my previous post, I told you, I won’t ever forget November 15 – that person, that line and that moment because it caused too much pain. But today God called me to lay down the hurts and forgive (as always). Who am I not to forgive, right? So yes, no matter how painful it is, I resolve to loving them and praying for them because I also choose not to bring destruction upon myself. I forgive you. I pray for you. I bless you – even if it hurts.

Fourth, I’ve been thinking about this lately whether to marry or not. And you know what, I realized that I was proclaiming I’m not going to commit to someone forever because I was full of resentment and bitterness. I know that apart from these, I also do not appreciate myself that much (very obvious by the way I comment on my own photos and make fun of myself). At first, I thought it’s better that way because it will save me from other people’s negative remarks but again, it’s worse. I’ve become a stranger to my own self. In the first place, I should be the one encouraging myself and praising myself: no matter how ridiculous it sounds. With this realization, I decided to give love a chance: if it blooms. And so, at 7p.m., I googled Rick Warren’s Advice of Finding True Love. I learned a lot from it. Instead of focusing on finding someone, I should be making myself better. I should not be unkind, disrespectful, judgmental, angry, immature. I have faith that if I start working now, I will change- slowly change…not for man but for God, for Heaven. Hmmmm. So much thoughts but I can’t really put them into words right now. I just shared the link just in case you want to listen to these talks.

Other notes:

Always set goals according to how God shaped you. 

S – piritual gifts

H-eart

A-bilities

P-ersonality

E-xperiences

Myth: I’m not going to date, I’m just going to wait.

Myth: There is only one person for me. 

So, mingle! LOL

The videos I watched today:

1. Learn How to Recognize God’s Voice with Rick Warren

2. Finding the Love of Your Life with Rick Warren

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About kaylathetheoxenophile

Hi everyone! I’m kayla. This is my first attempt to share my thoughts through blogging. Got lots of exploring to do. Don’t even know where to start and what to say. To start the ball rolling, allow me to share with you some of the fallacies about Kayla Marie Sarte. 1. Writing is just not my line. Although most considered me as a creative writer, I doubt I have that knack. I’m direct to the point. My essays are straight. As long as I get the message across then that’s fair enough for me. 2.I’m not a walking encyclopedia, got that? How funny it is to be asked by some bunch of kiddos bout tons of stuffs I don’t know or even have heard. Worse? They expect me to answer their queries in a snap. Good thing, I can always find the usual “busy” excuse to elude their endless questions. 3. You just don’t know how pain in the ass reading is to me. I always record the days I spend reading and do my best to keep the pace. Yeah, I’m a literature major but it’s uhmm, …. Except for required readings in my literature classes in the class, I haven’t truly deal with literary works personally. Good heavens, I found John Grisham and Dean Koontz – my all time faves. (In my later posts, I’ll be sharing my thoughts bout their books.) 4. One thing I found truly bleak about me is my loved for movies. I don’t like cinematography or even crave like Glenn Ortiz to be the Steven Spielberg of this race. I just enjoy watching movies on the big screen. That’s all. So, it’s a fallacy that I like cinematography… just the movies. 5. Call me braggart, arrogant. Many think so because of the achievements I gained in the past aching yet meaningful 15 education years of my life. What they don’t know is how negative and perturbed, covered with worries, stressed I am most of the time. No matter how great the laurel I get, I always look back at the failurs I’ve been through in the past. So, that goes to mean, I don’t think highly of myself or consider my awards that much. Top 3 things about me: 1. A Theophile 2. A Xenophile 3. Just Kayla Marie B. Sarte That’s all for now. You’ll get to know more about me soon and about the project 2012 that led me to explore blogging. J One thing is certain for me though, I love who I am for I am fashioned the way I fit exactly in a large mosaic we are all in. Be happy. Live life according to God’s will. – Kayla Sarte
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