Photo Journal #18: May 27, 2014 (Tuesday)

I was still recuperating from my suicidal, manic, venomenous thoughts on this day. Thanks to my sister Kath, who came from South Cotabato to submit her employment documents to RCBC Davao, for easing them and effacing some of them. We talked for hours after her initial question, “what happened?”. I narrated the events and recounted the root causes while rambling on and off how Jesus abandoned me. She did not throw her usual wake-up-you-moron retorts and so I sensed she wasn’t feeling well. And I was right. She vomitted and cried (the pain she’s carrying since she was in high school) for almost an hour while I (regretfully) did not show any concern at all. I was still at the stage of anger and was then, showing off how bad/evil I can be. Sooner though, I began to pass my whole bad-sister acting and took care of her. That’s when I realized, I was caged by others’ view for such a long time. I wasn’t evil after all. I began to see the new light and started checking my goals and saying goodbye to some of them. It did make me feel better and it reunited me with the Lord.

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About kaylathetheoxenophile

Hi everyone! I’m kayla. This is my first attempt to share my thoughts through blogging. Got lots of exploring to do. Don’t even know where to start and what to say. To start the ball rolling, allow me to share with you some of the fallacies about Kayla Marie Sarte. 1. Writing is just not my line. Although most considered me as a creative writer, I doubt I have that knack. I’m direct to the point. My essays are straight. As long as I get the message across then that’s fair enough for me. 2.I’m not a walking encyclopedia, got that? How funny it is to be asked by some bunch of kiddos bout tons of stuffs I don’t know or even have heard. Worse? They expect me to answer their queries in a snap. Good thing, I can always find the usual “busy” excuse to elude their endless questions. 3. You just don’t know how pain in the ass reading is to me. I always record the days I spend reading and do my best to keep the pace. Yeah, I’m a literature major but it’s uhmm, …. Except for required readings in my literature classes in the class, I haven’t truly deal with literary works personally. Good heavens, I found John Grisham and Dean Koontz – my all time faves. (In my later posts, I’ll be sharing my thoughts bout their books.) 4. One thing I found truly bleak about me is my loved for movies. I don’t like cinematography or even crave like Glenn Ortiz to be the Steven Spielberg of this race. I just enjoy watching movies on the big screen. That’s all. So, it’s a fallacy that I like cinematography… just the movies. 5. Call me braggart, arrogant. Many think so because of the achievements I gained in the past aching yet meaningful 15 education years of my life. What they don’t know is how negative and perturbed, covered with worries, stressed I am most of the time. No matter how great the laurel I get, I always look back at the failurs I’ve been through in the past. So, that goes to mean, I don’t think highly of myself or consider my awards that much. Top 3 things about me: 1. A Theophile 2. A Xenophile 3. Just Kayla Marie B. Sarte That’s all for now. You’ll get to know more about me soon and about the project 2012 that led me to explore blogging. J One thing is certain for me though, I love who I am for I am fashioned the way I fit exactly in a large mosaic we are all in. Be happy. Live life according to God’s will. – Kayla Sarte
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